i just need to rant...

i have to say it out. tho i'm very inspired and keen on finishing my exam papers, which is due today. but bless my HOD's kind soul, he has allowed for extension, so I'm handing in on Monday... and I WILL hand in on Monday!!!

anyway, the ranting...

my school has this lantern night thingie tonight in school, and all the lower sec classes are attending. so it is made known that the students must attend. the thing is, they didn't say that the form teachers MUST attend. (well, they say we're "strongly encouraged" to...) i dun see the point, really. not that i'm not supportive of the activity - i am! but not at the expense of teacher's free time! having to stay back all the way in school till 6pm just for the activity, when i could be at home doing work!

i dunno... maybe this feeling stems from the fact that i'm been staying back late in school way too often, been involved in too many school activities, and feel very cheated that my colleagues who are not be involved and can go home early. some are even not understanding, and say or do things which really hurt. so i think now that i'm the sucker. so i guess it's payback time now, especially when i have more important things to do.

so for now, i'll just act blur. have told a few colleagues that i won't be there. but if someone calls me and tells me that i've to be there later, then i have nothing to say already...

i have never felt this way before. am i feeling jaded? is it time for me to move on and do something else? or is it time for a change of environment...? even the thing i hold on most to (r/p with colleagues) seems to be falling apart... i really wish i can do my masters ASAP so that upon getting that paper, i can get out of the school system and do something else... maybe lecture in NIE or something... just need to find some way to leave the school, where there are a better bunch of students and a more organised middle management...

ok... now that i've let it out of my chest, it's back to work...