Random thoughts...

OK, I'm back. Realised I've not blogged for a while. It's been a week into the June holidays now, but I can safely say that my June holidays only last for... 5 days! How did this happen, you may ask. Well, let's just say I don't count the weekends as holidays, so we're left with the weekdays. 1st week of hols, if I'm not busy with bridging, I'm either down for CCA or busy conducting workshops for my student leaders. And having AEWF in the beginning of that week and a wedding to play for at the end didn't really help. This week, I have CCA on Tues and Thurs, next week I'll be back in school for time-tabling from Wednesday onwards, then the last week of the hols will see me at Sijori Resort @ Sentosa for our annual Staff Retreat. So... Not much left for a holiday, huh...?

Admittedly, I'm feeling drained out. Really dislike the feeling of being controlled by events in my life, instead of me controlling them! The many deadlines and committments kinda made me the person I have been, and I know that person's not me. It's as though something/someone has completely taken over my life and I have no say in it anymore. And I'm getting sick and tired of it all!!!

Was just rattling off my lack-of-hols to the small group over lunch on Sunday, when Mike actually gave me a reality check. People like him who work in the bank for hours on end are not complaining, but in fact giving thanks to God for His Provision in all things - a job, a family, a home, clothes to wear... It's a wonder we can worry about these things and complain about them when there are those in the world that lack these things. As Sufen shared about the concerns of some church members in their missions trip to Thailand during small group on Sunday, some of the things that were shared (worrying about clothing, medication) made Mike question "What are you going there for". The naive person in me thought the answer was obvious - to teach basic English to the students there. Then, I realised there was more to the question. Are we really out there to do God's Work, be it doing our daily activities or missions work, or are we all so caught up on our daily worries and anxieties that we lose focus of the main purpose of what we're doing?

Though this hols seem shortened, will try my best to get complete rest in Him, to do the things I've been wanting to do for a long time (especially to read His Word more) and basically to find my life back and to let God take control of my life and situations, and not let the situations control it. I pray that through this break, no matter how long it is, I will get enough physical strength to do the things tasked for me in the busy Semester 2...